This morning I woke up with an insatiable hunger for knowledge on a mystical and powerful creature.
But I'll give you some hints instead of telling you what it is.
I promise this relates to music and may or may not be related to today’s song.
Back to the creature.
When I started the research, I expected some cool facts like “they dig very fast” and “Make funny noises.”
But no. What the internet told me was worse.
These tiny pringle-shaped mammals have a terrible secret…
A secret that will hopefully bring light to the terrible atrocities these creatures commit daily…
And that is the problem they pose to earthworms.
Yeah they dig pretty fast at 15 feet per hour. (Two 6ft males and a 2ft manlet per hour.)
But apart from that, their entire body is built to search and eradicate earthworms.
To begin with, they have a built-in worm radar that finds and locks into the nearest earthworm like a homing missile.
To make things better, their saliva is a paralyzer made specifically for earthworms.
Not only that, they locate and eat them quite quickly and effectively.
One of the main subspecies finds and eats earthworms in MICROSECONDS. It’s the fastest-eating mammal that would bankrupt all the Golden Corrals in the nation.
Imagine being an earthworm. You're chilling on the dirt with wormy friends when the ground shakes a bit, and everything goes dark shortly after.
The creature detected you from 15 feet away and executed you before you knew what was going on.
And if you thought you were safe underwater, no luck there. These death machines can breathe and detect worms underwater.
Another hilarious thing is they CLEAN the worms out by squeezing all the dirt from their guts. (That’s today's fun fact.)
But one or two worms are not enough. To be satisfied, they must eat 70% of their body weight, so about 100-1000 earthworms a day.
Of course, they sometimes hunt and build “Snack Pits”. It’s said they save thousands of earthworms for later.
But the most relatable (lol) part about the genocidal mole is that, well…
They live solitary lives and isolated lives. Only leaving their earthworm elimination duties to breed more earthworm destroyers.
Can you guess what this creature is?
I'll give you a couple seconds to think. Scroll down when you're ready.
The mystical creature is: The Mole.
Yep. The Mole is nothing more but an earthworm genocider with a 5-year lifespan.
In just five short years they can eradicate tens to hundreds of thousands of earthworms.
Yeah, this all sounds horrible. And I hope to have broken the illusion that these are peaceful creatures.
But hey - that’s what the insatiable hunger for knowledge does to a simple human. it throws you into a wild 4-hour knowledge hunt for nature's atrocities.
And that insatiable hunger leads you and me to find new music. Music that understands what we’re feeling and scratches that mental itch.
We can skip through dozens or even hundreds of songs until we find “the one.” Like a mole searching for earthworms
Today’s song - incidentally - is what I imagine a mole hears 24/7.
For this song, you must close your eyes and imagine you’re a lowly mole who just woke up and feels slightly hungry.
And with that hunger comes your mission: Find and consume as many earthworms as possible (while collecting some for later).
Otherwise, the song will just let you down and be yet another riddim song you’ve heard before.
In any case…
Njoy.
Genre: Moles have terrible eyesight can’t see very well.
Always Digging Forward
Hz
P.S. Did you enjoy this animal breakdown? Let me know in the poll below!
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